The weather outside is...

...delightful, actually.

You know how life always works out according to our careful planning?

Two weeks ago, I was dodging questions about my future, vague answers and quick subject changes my saving grace.  And then...SUDDENLY SEYMOUR, I had a plan.

Outdated musical references aside, in one single week...

1. I bought a suit.
2. I took the VCLA.
3. I spent some much needed time with my friends in the 'burg.
   
4. I presented my graduate research.
5. I went to a Julia Nunes Living Room Concert in Philadelphia.
   
6. I had a job interview.
7. I house hunted.
8. I got a job.
9. I signed a lease.
10. I graduated.
    
11. I wished a very dear friend a very happy birthday with a very good wine.
12. I met the children that will be my very first students as a real teacher.
13. I took the RVE.
14. I had my wisdom toof pulled.

"Isn't it funny how you only understand a place before you leave?  And suddenly everything looks so shiny..." - How About You

Next week I celebrate Christmas with my married brother for the first time ever.  I intend to throw my whole heart and soul into our celebrations this year, I have a week to celebrate Christmas, that is my number one priority.
However, somewhere in that week, I also need to babysit, house-sit, move to the other side of the state, get a background check and become an official school employee, and celebrate NYE in NYC with the most wonderful girl in the world.  I have a feeling that, by next Christmas, life will be radically different... for one thing, I'll be a big girl with a paycheck.

Life in your twenties is just a constant transition. I am a thousand things right now, but most of all I am blessed.

Old friends, new places.

I left school on Friday with the intention of 

leaving work at work for the first time in nearly a month.

Mission accomplished.

So OKAY YES.  We're growing up.  Doing big things and moving to 

NEW AND EXCITING PLACES.

This is Ekat's apartment in Alexandria.  Pretty Shnazzy.

This is the harbor in Old Town, Alexandria (also pictured in the first picture...

redundant?  You know, I don't think so...)

It felt SO GOOD to let go, man.  I am becoming aware of how easy it is to become a workaholic.  My life consists of mostly seven-year olds.  THERE ARE NO COMPLAINTS.  However, working all the time makes play time OH-SO-SWEET.  Also... sometimes I still feel like an eight year old at a sleepover.  BUT IT'S COOL 'cause now I'm allowed to drink.

Things about which I am thinking:
-Every time I am in DC, I feel a magnetic pull.  It's an amazing city... It's ALIVE.

-Every time I'm in Nova, I get stressed and weird feelings.

-I DON'T KNOW WHERE I WANT TO LIVE.

In summation:  I still think this video is hilarious.

Crayola doesn't make a color for this.

TEACHING, you see, is like this:

Sometimes it's giant hugs and I-was-WONDERING-where-you-weres from students when you were in the workroom when they came in and they thought you weren't coming today.

Sometimes it's realizing one of those precious darlings didn't take his medicine and has consequently failed to bring anything at all with him to school.

I love what I do, and I love that I get to do it for the rest of my life.  And yet, with each passing day I am realizing the insane amount of work that goes into this job.  I am constantly hanging things up, cutting things out, shoving 23 copies of this math worksheet, calling this parent, touching base about this literacy lesson and whether Tommy's dad's deployment will have any effect on his math scores and my turkey sandwich into a 20 minute lunch break.  

I am developing eyes in the back of my head.  It's true, we do have them.

I am developing the ability to answer 9 questions at the same time, and hug 11 kids in ten seconds to make sure every kid gets hugged at least once today.  I always wondered how teachers could remember  each kid's bus number and which of them can't eat the skittles the substitute passed out because of his orthodontic appliances.  

All of a sudden it makes sense.

Love allows us to do the impossible.  I love teaching, and I love each of my nineteen students.  I find myself chasing a kid down the hallway because it has become genuinely important to me to ensure that  he saw the new student's MarioKart backpack, because I know he loves Mario.  (And, of course, he has already seen it... :P)

And on the reverse side, I have begun to take it personally when students don't connect with a lesson.  I know how capable they are.  I haven't begun to scratch the surface of their potential, but I do know that they can get this.  I do know that, if they can get their fingers out of their noses and their legs out from under their neighbors desks and their eyes from of the ceiling, I know that if I can just get their attention, they can learn.  I LOVE that feeling.  I love the curriculum-related chatter that happens in the hallway after a lesson that set their minds ablaze.  I love their insane and wonderful little minds.  I love their catch-phrases.  I love hearing "Let's DO this thing" when I've explained the rules to the number grid game and set them loose with their partners.

And if nothing else, this is for certain:

Someone will ALWAYS fart at carpet time.

Outside of school, my life is quiet.  It's so different from the constantly social, constantly exciting environment I left behind at JMU.  And I miss it.  I miss the easy access to friends, I miss the meal plans and I miss life after 10pm.

So of course I turn to my true north Katie H. for advice and guidance about continuing to grow in an environment that feels so comfortable to me--living in my hometown with my parents.

Naturally, she suggested that I turn my focus inward.  I have set goals for myself, starting with paying attention to the bad habits I've allowed myself to develop over the past five years.

1. Be Light-Hearted.  "It's easy to be heavy, hard to be light."

2. Don't assume people know you're joking.

3. Distance myself from my politics-- I can't engage in any kind of constructive conversation when something feels so absolutely personal to me.  Getting a little distance allows me to hear other people and even make my points more digestible.

4. Don't leave things on your to-do list.  Just... get things done.  

5.  Ask.

6. Let things happen.

7. Stop buying things that don't fit correctly.  Stop buying things you don't love.  Go back to basics, and accessorize with trends.

That first point, that's something my girlfriend does effortlessly.  I am studying under her tutelage, and yes that word does always make me giggle. 

Ah, skypelove.

I've been reading a lot about Long Distance Relationships (LDRs) lately, and I tell ya what-- it ain't for the faint o' heart.  But this girl, our Baltimore mornings and OBX sunsets, her freckles, her laugh and our fingernails when they're painted the same color--it's worth it.

In other news--

Hooray Hampton roads!  You attempted public transit!  I am elated.  Except... this train has like... two and a half stops.  BUT WHATEVER.  Baby steps, right?  Make this sucker connect to the oceanfront and you've improved my life ten-fold.

WHY is it so hard/complicated/time-consuming/expensive to take one of these from here to Baltimore?  I just wanna be able to read/write/doodle pictures of flowers like a 12-year-old while someone else drives me around, ya hear?

I'm happy here.  I'm growing here.  I'm ready to be planted, ready to thrive.

But for now, this:

I know it's September, but...

Responsible adulthood has an addictive zeal, one I never expected to find.

Met all my new kiddos yesterday!!  Well... 14 of them.  They are the cutest.  Fell in love 14x over.

A city simplified...

Exhausted but happy.  In the immortal words of Annie, I think I'm gonna like it here.

We've got everything we need...

...and right now, everything we need is enough.

I'm a do-er.  I always have been.  I like to make things happen.  I don't like for time to be wasted.  On the surface, this is a quality of which I am proud.  Down a little deeper, I know that it is a quality on which I need to work.  Sometimes actions speak louder than words.  Sometimes you have to let things happen.

My brother's house is quickly becoming 

one of my favorite places 

What we like to do:

On our last day of summer.

My furry niece and nephew

Tomorrow is the big day!  Tomorrow I will start twelve weeks of student teaching.  Nervous is an understatement.  I couldn't even focus long enough to pick out an outfit.  (In my head I'm thinking Navy pants, white blouse?  But maybe that's too dressy for an inservice week?  Maybe I should go khaki pants, nice tee, cardigan?  But honestly, I'd rather be over-dressed than under-dressed.  I... gotta go, guys...)

Update: My first day was fantastic.  If they needed a new teacher, I'd take a job at this school in an instant.

Rain and Dancing.

Oh man... this week wasn't my best for posting every day.

Things are busy, rearing up to start school and completing all of those "nagging tasks" that have bothered me throughout the summer... and for each task that I tackle, a thousand back-up errands take their place.

Discovered what the boardwalk had to offer earlier this week with one of my very favorite people.

Wild Rumpus, indeed.  I love this girl.  And Waterman's orange crushes.  Obviously it was a good night.

I'm a little stressed and a little terrified, but how could I not be?  I hope I am prepared.  I hope I am ready for all of the failures and successes that are headed my way--but especially the failures. They will happen.  Lessons will bomb.  Kids will misbehave.  THAT is where I am going to learn, not when things go right, but when things go WRONG.

But for now I'm going to relax and enjoy this MIA MICHAELS DEDICATED EPISODE OF SO YOU THINK YOU CAN DANCE (OH my gosh...) & this rainy day.  No one does storms like Mia Michaels... or Virginia Beach.

I like to meditate now and zen.

If yesterday was any indication of what's to come, I am going to love the second grade.

Went to Maryland yesterday/this morning to pick up my newly repaired Satobot--only to get rear ended in my rental car on the way up.  Hahahaha I can't even... OH I AM SO ZEN.

Anyway, everything worked out just fine and I still got to spend time with some of my favorite people, and one of my favorite puppies:

Seriously... I love this dog more than I love most people.

Someone asked me today about my future.  Nothing makes me dizzier.  How about this:  If you're talking to someone in their twenties, don't ask them what they're GOING to do next year, ask them what they WANT to do RIGHT AT THAT MOMENT.  That's as far as I can go, really.  Life's too big and beautiful for pigeon holes.

...besides, if you're friends with twenty-somethings who have their lives planned, get new friends.  Spoiler alert: those are boring people.

Other notable things I learned today:

1. The Underworld is a stupid movie, but running from vampires in the cardio cinema is a hell of a workout.

2. Stuff You Should Know: Shark Diaries  Seriously.  You can have Shark Week any week.
(Also, I listened to an an incredible [and incredibly old] radiolab podcast about memory & forgetting, can't believe I almost forgot to post about it--HA.  Seriously though, listen to radiolab.  It will change your life. )

3.  I'm really glad that I'm not living in Berlin, Maryland right now.

A thought:

Meeting my mentor teacher today.  I'm nervous.  It's like a first date, except the state of Virginia is mandating that we be together for at least twelve weeks.

Take me the way I am.

All Ingrid, all the time.

Also, it's like one of those clue novels 

where you get to pick your ending. 

Some day I'm going to start off each morning 

singing this to my students.

Changed my desktop to a spice girls wallpaper.  #bestdecisionivemadeallday

MAN, it's going to be hard not waking up to the beach tomorrow.  #endofvacationproblems

Coffee and chocolate with an old friend today. #somethingschange #somethingsneverdo



Amazing phone conversation with my true north tonight: #book-cationpending #youcalibrateme

Missing my girl, missing that face. #nowords #hashtagsfallshort

Oh, let's get rich and buy our parents homes in the south of France...

My parents have been married for twenty-seven years today.

How many fights have they lovingly resolved,

how many times have they thought it was just too hard,

only to conjure up the strength to keep moving, keep loving?

I am inspired by them, inspired by their love.

Went on a walk tonight, 

Megan was a crab's hero,

saving it from the thrusts of a dog's jaw

and clueless human onlookers.

Because evil exists when good men stand by and do nothing, right JFK?

I stepped on this. 

23 things I should be able to do at 23 (but can't)

GPOY.

Friends

Woke up to the beach again this morning, despite the absence of her at my side.  Stealing covers is less fun when there's no one from whom to steal.

Nevertheless, today promises donuts, beachshine (that's sunshine on the beach, duh!), & QT with Nelly (my uke) on the porch.  Life is so good.  I wish it could be summer forever.

One of our favorite games is "Would you rather?"  A few days ago, during a particularly rousing round of mini-golf, I asked:

Would you rather live a normal life or live a mostly normal life that also contains the best and worst days mankind hath ever experienced?
(This question works best if you can use your moviefone voice in the asking).

It was interesting to hear each response.  My mom, who has already lived quite a remarkable life, was wise enough to pick the normal life.  My sister in law rationalized that it would take a lot more than one good day to offset the worst day of mankind, and thus also picked the normal life.

I couldn't help but consider the Keats poem that became my life's mantra in a Keezell located Gen Ed English classroom five years ago.  It boils down to this:  Every human emotion has an equal and opposite emotion.  Every sadness increases our ability to feel happiness and vice versa.

Obviously, I picked the latter option.

Enjoy all your bests & worsts today!

"Make sure you write that I'm annoying..."

Dangit... not my most successful resolution.  Oh well, I promise to try to be better from here on out!

Current status:  One foot on the coffee table, both eyes out the window looking at the ocean.  Ah, sweet summer time.

Oops... I even started THIS post yesterday and forgot to finish it.  Beach houses mean it's time to run away.

"Do you like wet towels?  Do you?  Do you?"

I'd like to keep this one, I tell you what.

Alright, she is clearly becoming bored.  I solemnly swear to try my hardest to keep updating regularly.


Sincerely,
Lauren

I forgot to post yesterday because something beautiful showed up in my driveway holding cupcakes.

You guys understand.

Also I thought maybe I needed to lose a few pounds, so I chopped off all my hair.



New hair, new life, same girl.

How We Love

2007

2012

At my core, I am still the same girl I have always been.

Just smarter, more experienced and poorer.

I am happy here.  I have been happy to be home today. 

I just needed an adjustment period.

These "one sentence" posts are good in terms of my consistency and sticking with resolutions... but they do make things a little melodramatic.

Lighter things that happened today:

"I know I need to get a hair cut... I just get so attached to it.  You know, cause it grows on me."

"You're using Christa McAuliffe in your diverse scientist study?"

"Yes...?"

"Oh, great... tell the kids to study real hard,

pursue a career in the sciences and 

then you too can blow up in space."

TOMORROW.

(Tomorrow I get to see my heart <3>

We have fallen down again tonight, in this world it's hard to get it right...

gym, rain, babies and dogs

life's good... even when it isn't.

Making my own atmosphere of growth,

learning to be a better person,

and REALLY looking forward 

to seeing my girlfriend in two days :)

Expectation is the root of all heartache

Catching up with old friends, shopping for things I can't afford, finding out sno-cones can be "stuffed."  Williamsburg.

Sunday is a day for catching up!  I've heard from nearly everyone that matters to me today.

One of my biggest fears in leaving my beautiful life in Harrisonburg was that I'd lost my "sounding board."  Thank god for Skype, for cell phones, for text messages... for never really losing touch.

Finally getting my room together.  The best kinds of fresh starts begin with organization!

Wishlist:
1. Large, black-framed perspective photo of the Eiffel Tower.
2. New lamp
3. Cute boxes for storage

"Oh, what a rumpus!"
"I don't even know what a rumpus is!"
"Well, perhaps that's part of the problem..."

Sometimes the most exciting thing about going to bed is knowing that there's a cup of coffee waiting for me on the flip-side of this pillow.  Life's grand :)

Imperceptible Smile

1. Beach

2. Wedding

3. Chocolate coffee

4. Birthday Dinner

5. Think myself silly

That's a list of things I did today.

That's funny because she took one meaning of the word "tuning..."

Amazing dinner with old friends tonight.  After a long week of wondering if this place will ever feel like home again, it's nice to laugh myself silly over a glass milk bottle.

This is a picture from last night.

Thanks for tuning in.

...See what I did there?

Human Again

 Going to see Ingrid, because that is something I can't do enough.

Finished my MAT thesis proposal an hour ago.

Have a new life-plan possibility brewing in my mind.

Am apparently into sentence fragments today.

Turning Page

I want to live like this dance feels.

As per chapter six in Gretchen Rubin's The Happiness Project, I am making a resolution for a one sentence blog every day in August.

If you haven't read this book, 

drop what you're doing

and Do it Now.

I feel as though this is the perfect way for me to catch a thousand fleeting memories.  Even though I'm cheating and today's entry is going to be a lot more than a sentence.

Meet Nelly.  It's love at first strum.

Who lives in this sad, lonely place? 

Remember when it was once the cutest apartment in the mill?  

Full of love, laughter, and admittedly some gas.  

I'm not emotionally prepared to write what I really feel

about leaving Harrisonburg behind...

(I tried, though.)

So, for now. Thank you.

No place has ever felt as much like home.

Updates, downdates... all-around dates.

Apparently my roommates have had a semester-long running joke about the potentiality of me being a spy because they never know where I am or what I'm doing.  And that doesn't surprise me, because I rarely know where I am these days either.

I spent a few weeks in Virginia Beach where I'll be student teaching in the second grade this fall.  Whenever I am home, I fall in love.  I see myself in an apartment by the beach or in Ghent, close to my family, my brother and sister in law.  I don't know, I don't know where I'll end up... but I know I'll have a puppy.

Currently I'm in Harrisonburg, taking summer classes and watching more MadMen than any person should.  It's lovely albeit bittersweet.  I am so keenly aware of the finite nature of this summer.  August first, I leave Harrisonburg for the last time.  Man I'm gonna miss those $17 grocery bills, farmers markets, $1 mimosas at the Nile... and that's just Harrisonburg.  I've already grown to miss so much of JMU.  

--Alright.  That's enough of this love letter to this city.

I went to four weddings in four weeks:

Each wedding was beautiful in its own way, and each intensely personal and valuable to me.  Weddings are such a interesting form of personal expression, and I loved that I could feel each couple and their personalities in each of their respective big days.

It's also so crazy to think that 3 of these four couples are my age.  I'll let that factoid linger, I'm not yer prepared for any sort of commentary on it.

A summer reads update:  I've just finished Miss Peregrine's Home for Peculiar Children, and I'm contemplating a restart of Game of Thrones.  What are you guys reading?

Shout-Out to the Myriad People Involved in Making Me Literate

Because I'm working on this project and at first I was like:

So eventually I thought I'd START the research.

And then I was like.

So then I thought maybe I needed a fresh perspective.

And then I was all:

Conditions are deteriorating.

A Fitter Foot

My brother is a personal trainer, and he'll tell you:

It's important. It's the only one you get. It's your body.

When I leave my body on the back burner, when I choose fritters over fruits and veggies, it wears down on every part of me. This is something I know to be incontrovertibly true And yet... sometimes it's still so hard to make that choice. To get up and get moving. To make food with micronutrients and not in the microwave.

This has been on my mind for a thousand reasons, including but not limited to: The lack of energy I recognize in myself when I am not treating my body right; the motivation I struggle to find to make myself get moving; and documentaries like Food Inc. which brought to light the dangers in not knowing what we are eating, & Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead which has inspired me to start juicer shopping. Ohheyyy Amazon!

Also, a friend of mine writes an AWESOME health blog and her most recent post is about juicing. Interestingly, she was also inspired by watching Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead. Netflix, man. It brings people together!

If anyone has insight into the exciting world of juicer shopping, let's chat. Because I don't really know what I'm doing... and Amazon Reviews are no substitute for good friends.

Secondly, I've started CrossFit training. And by "started," I mean "went-this-morning-and-loved-it." A friend of mine from my grad program swears by this strength and conditioning method. If you're not familiar with it, get on youtube. And then try it.... because it seems to me like the kind of fitness program everyone should have time to do.

Obviously... this means I need new shoes:

Alright, alright... I'm quieting my inner, consumer-driven mind. The truth is: You don't need to buy anything to start being more fit. You only need to make the decision, that's where it starts. And I'm making the decision now.

“My thoughts are stars I cannot fathom into constellations.”

Last night, I cried to her about missing the fictional characters in the book I just finished. She is still dating me today. Oh man, folks...

Hello world!

Life is speeding on around me, but I am feeling competent for the first time in a long time... and, since I'm months away from being a first-year teacher, I'm probably feeling competent for the last time in a long time, HA. So, what I'm saying is that I need to enjoy this while it lasts.

My nail polish is called "Eternal Optimist."

My nail polish and I have that in common.

Here's a List of Exciting Things:

1. Tomorrow I'm turning my kindergarten classroom into PRODUCERS and DIRECTORS. Baby Spielbergs. They're gonna love it... maybe?
2. My favorite professor is currently waiting to hear from a grant proposal that may grant me funding as a GA for the summer. WHICH WOULD SAVE ME from a summer of restocking value priced merchandise at your friendly, neighborhood CVS.
3. I have not one but TWO professors working with me towards publication, which means my resume will be colorful. Because I'm printing it on pink paper. Oh man I'm funny. Hahaha, but seriously if these articles come to fruition, I'll be in better shape on my job search.
4. One of these articles is going to be the basis of my inquiry project in the fall. Which means I'll have SUPPORT. Thank little baby Jesus.
5. I'm going to a conference this weekend at George Mason to present about the internship blog I worked with as an undergrad. My best friend is going to a conference in Vegas. Today we realized that we are pretty big deals, ya know?
   After the conference, I'm gonna see some girl. You know, just whomever shows up...
6. My brother's wedding is just around the corner. I've ordered my bridesmaids dress and it's pretty damned fabulous. In fact, I have three weekends of weddings in a row this summer. Love is in the air.
7. SOME DAY I'm going to make a documentary about dramatic play in my classroom. My vision? Shakespeare.

Lists are fun, right? Alright, alright. I know that's a nerdy list. But like... if the shoe fits:

“Saying 'I notice you're a nerd' is like saying, 'Hey, I notice that you'd rather be intelligent than be stupid, that you'd rather be thoughtful than be vapid, that you believe that there are things that matter more than the arrest record of Lindsay Lohan. Why is that?' In fact, it seems to me that most contemporary insults are pretty lame. Even 'lame' is kind of lame. Saying 'You're lame' is like saying 'You walk with a limp.' Yeah, whatever, so does 50 Cent, and he's done all right for himself.”

― John Green

Someone in Harrisonburg needs to take up the ukulele... and then make me better. That is all.

All we can do...

Something I've learned along the way: Stop taking things so seriously.

Things always end up working themselves out, and the amount of worry/panic that you put into it has little to no bearing on this fact.

This is me NOT SERIOUSLY considering the

bagel on my desk.

What's happening now is bizarre in the best kind of way. I don't know where it came from, but that happens so often in life that I've decided to stop questioning it. I'm not in a hurry. I know where I am, who I am, what I want and now I know better than to settle for anything less. I am enjoying this feeling, I am enjoying the experience, and I am mandating that I not let irrational thoughts of self-doubt interfere. Why should I? If it doesn't work, then it was something that made me happy for at least a little bit and there is something better coming. That said, it's probably one of the scariest things that has happened to me in a long time. But if it isn't scary, it isn't worth it. If I'm not pushing myself, pushing my boundaries and breaking my patterns, than I am not growing. I'm stagnant. And that's how you get malaria, folks.

...that's a mosquito joke. Niche humor.

Something else I've learned: When I like someone, I'm going to know about it.

I don't ever have to guess. So, the next time I find myself wondering "Could I like this person?" or "Why don't I like this person?," I'm going to stop. If I have to ask, I don't. And that's okay. Ohh, that's a subcategory of this heading:

Something else I've learned:

a) Never feel guilty about your feelings.

There are a multitude of things in life about which you are going to feel guilty. You are responsible for your behavior 24/7 and for each of the one million choices we make every day. Sometimes you are going to make the wrong choice. It's going to happen. And you are going to feel guilty. Your feelings are not in your control. They are what they are. Be honest about them, but never degrade or begrudge a feeling that you do or do not have.

This week in kindergarten, we are studying presidents. Things I've learned from 5 year olds: Justin Bieber is of legal voting age; Dr. Seuss' birthday is today. I'm not sure that either of those facts are entirely relevant.

One more thing I've learned: Slow down.

It's more than just a 'The Academy Is...' song. People never rarely regret taking the time to think things through. My personality sometimes makes me prone to impulsivity. I race past my own starting line before ever taking the time to consider if I actually want to run the race. The best things in life are worth waiting for... and if you're not careful, you'll find yourself squashing possibilities, rushing past them without pause for consideration. Ask all the questions in your mind. Don't be afraid to realize incongruencies and negatives. They don't necessarily discount the value of the situation, but being aware of them will aid you in preparing for them.

& Finally:

Dear Universe,

Thank you for everything. Especially Jupiter and Venus. Don't make life easy, but please make it grand.

Love always,

Me.